Couching.

Meet my couch:

Bedcouch!

What couch? Look closer. It's disguised as a bed. OK, it is technically a bed, but I use it as a couch. It seemed convenient for size and storage when I first moved into my co-op in April 2009.

I don't get a lot of time to lounge on it anymore. I'm more likely to eat dinner at my kitchen island or my computer table. When I unfold the drying rack for laundry it sits between Bedcouch and the TV, leaving no more space in the living "room" for things like exercise or people.

Living "Room"

Yesterday I read a horoscope that reminded me a lot of my Discardian lifestyle. Lately I've run out of things to toss. Already had a big purge of stuff over the summer. For the most part, my home is pretty neat except for the computer/work table, where the beads and junk mail live.

If I've run out of things to Discard, and my home is pretty consistently neat, why does it feel so cramped?

*Gasp* BEDCOUCH!!!

I chose Bedcouch this from the island of unused family furniture for my new apartment because:

1. It was my childhood bed (plus a newer mattress).
2. Offered crash/cuddle space for visitors.
3. Storage underneath.
4. Free!

Now we are reevaluating our relationship.

1. Childhood was not so much fun akshally. And a decade ago.
   
2. Not a lot of people come to visit me in Central Queens. Nobody comes to my house for cuddles.
3. Stored inside is extra bedding for Bedcouch, and a ton of photos that I could scan. The drawer closest to the wall is blocked by my end table.
4. It is taking up a lot of space that I pay to live in (mortgage, maintenance), and gets in the way of exercise and other fun stuff.
   

At first I was looking to replace it with a big puffy easy chair or recliner, but those are expensive. I am also pathologically afraid of getting bedbugs from new purchases of anything made of fabric. And stationary furniture may still get in the way of swordy fun time. But it is nice to have a seating area across from the TV, or diagonal from my computer screen, for the rare night I have off for watching DVDs. Usually all that sits on Bedcouch is laundry baskets & craft supplies.

Now I'm leaning towards an inflatable couch like this one. Comes with gadgets!! It can be folded up and put away when there are parties, swords*, or both. Or construction. Even better, I can take it to conventions and use it as a bed! No more having to fight for bed space at the con!

This weekend I'm planning to stay home and relax, a LOT. (Life = crazy, hence delays in blogness.) This will give me plenty of time to figure out the fate of Bedcouch. And all the extra pillows and bed linens that would go with it. Hail Discardia!



*The swords I practice with are not actually sharp, so not a threat to inflatable furniture.

Don't Pity the Spinsters ;-)

My friend emailed me about this awesome article:
Don't Pity the Spinsters

Yay! It it so awesome to see women taking care of themselves, and their own. In a large swath of our society women are supposed to take care of themselves last. Supposedly a man is also supposed to take care of her, and children are supposed to be grateful and respectful, but when that fails the wife/mother has to pick up the slack anyway.

I agree with the author that if a person has found a partner that truly works and cares in equal amounts, awesome! Unfortunately, lots of people have a hard time distinguishing the differences between a partner and a parasite. Both men and women need to watch out for social/emotional/economic parasites. But when society still tells us we need to get hitched, this can get confusing and depressing.

I really like my life, I take care of myself :-). Well... I'm getting there. At least I have the time and space to listen to myself and fix my problems. It actually saves a lot of time and energy when you're not waiting for someone else to fix things for you.

Some people have not been supportive about this path I'm on. My friends and this author have similar stories. I still think that kind of nastiness stems from insecurity, that weird unhealthy need for people to tear others down. Especially when different choices lead to less miserable outcomes. Insecurity leads to the Romatrix, Neo.


While lurking, I found another article from Charleston that I liked:
A Home of One's Own

After my own real estate adventures, I'm still not quite ready to post advice on it. But I will someday. I totally know where this lady's been, although my situations and plans are a little different. Real estate makes ya crazy.


Now I'm leaving work to hang out with writers, bohemians, and crazy types ON A BOAT!

S.A.W. day two, part two

So... my co-op deal may be delayed by another month or two, if not canceled entirely. There was a communication problem between BoA and it's attorney for closing, so it had to be canceled. Not sure if we are staying with this bank or mortgage, even though we are in the middle of the deal.

It's still all "maybes" right now. But I say again, please don't apply for a mortgage through Bank of America, evar. They may have been good at it once, but those days are long gone.

I was very, VERY upset when this was all presented to me at the end of the work day, so I couldn't call around to all of the lawyers and bankers to get it sorted out. Like, broke down crying at work upset. And I was supposed to close on the co-op this Thursday.


In light of this week's blogathon, I don't have an s.o. to call up and demand cuddles from when things like this happen. On the other hand, I have parents to call for support, and friends to call for help, and EVEN MORE friends who are promising cuddles and hugs the next time I see them. Srlsy, Wicked Faire is going to be me covered in hugs at all hours.

Hooray! I <3 being single!!! I get all the love I can seek out!!!

This week's good/bad news:

Good news! I have a closing date for the co-op deal, next Thursday! *happydance* If everything works out, I can be moved into the new place by the end of the month.


Bad news! My lawyer called me back, asking if I was with HSBC or BoA. Because the bank lawyer mentioned HSBC, not BoA. In increasing order of possible bad: either the lawyer just flubbed and said the wrong bank by accident, or BoA sold my mortgage to HSBC (I think the deal would still go thru?), or the bank's lawyer has sent forms around for the wrong mortgage.

I know a bank can sell it's mortgages to other banks. I checked my documents before today, it says so, but also says whoever owns the mortgage can't make me pay it all at once or futz around with percents or payments.

But can a bank sell a mortgage when the property hasn't even been closed on? Without telling the purchaser?

Good thing I already have a lawyer.


BTW, Singles Awareness Week Blogathon! Next week! If you're coming to play, tell me so I can add you to our carnivale!

Playing Catch-up.

Hay guys, sorry I've been off the radar for a week. I am in the middle of trying to buy a co-op in Queens. Someday I'll put up a whole series of "How [not to] deal with NYC real estate" posts, but right now it's taken over enough of my life. Packing, pleading with bankers and lawyers, argh.

But I can give one piece of advice: DON'T get a mortgage through Bank of America, especially if you're buying something other than a standard house. Especially x2 if it's a co-op in NYC.

BoA sends ALL of their mortgage applications to an office in Tampa, FL for processing. I've had three loan reps at this office in the last two months, not counting all the people on their hotline that try to help me when my loan reps aren't at work.

Because they are in FL and not NY, my dealings with them went something like this:

(Mid December)
Sassy: When can I expect to close on the co-op, if they approve me tomorrow? My contract says late January, but my lawyer says it can be earlier.
Loan rep #1: Sure! We can probably be ready for closing the first week of January.
Sassy: Hooray!

(One week later)
Sassy: So the co-op approved me, and they need a Recognition Agreement form before we can set a closing date.
Loan rep #2: What's a Recognition Agreement? Oh, your old loan rep got sent to another department, after taking a week's worth of vacation and doing nothing with your application. Whatevs.

(First week of 2009)
Sassy: I still need that Recognition Agreement please? Can you send it to me?
Random Banker: From what I see in your file, your case has been transferred again. But that person's manager is very experienced with mortgages, so he'll probably know what you're talking about. Because I don't. What's a co-op?

(Second Week of 2009)
Loan Rep #3 (voicemail): We've mailed the R.A., but we won't say to whom. And then our phones are going to get torn up, so when you try to call back you will be redirected to the Atlanta office. :-P
Sassy's Lawyer: They sent the forms to the bank's lawyer, who sent it to the co-op, instead of to you. Without even looking at them, the co-op's lawyer says they aren't in the correct format.
BoA's Lawyer: We don't print R.A.'s in any other format than ours, so take it or leave it :-P
Co-op's Lawyer: Fine, we'll take it. But it will be another two weeks to get them from the co-op's management office to our law office :-P.

Today, the co-op's lawyer finally got the necessary documents from the bank, but don't have the results of the LIEN search, so I still don't have a closing date. I got approved by the co-op board on December 15th, and I'll be lucky if I close before February 15th. I kinda want to hit things with sticks.

Co-ops are difficult to deal with on their own, but thanks to it's mismanagement and foot-dragging, BoA has stretched my transaction out weeks longer than necessary. To add insult to injury, the interest rates have gone down since we started this long painful dance. If the other parties in this real estate deal can't settle on a closing date before late February, my mortgage offer expires anyway and I have to start from scratch.

I don't know what other parts of the U.S. are like, but if you are investing in something other than a standard house (co-op, condo, kabutz), try to keep the transaction within your state/city lines. It may add fees, but it may also cut time.