Couching.

Meet my couch:

Bedcouch!

What couch? Look closer. It's disguised as a bed. OK, it is technically a bed, but I use it as a couch. It seemed convenient for size and storage when I first moved into my co-op in April 2009.

I don't get a lot of time to lounge on it anymore. I'm more likely to eat dinner at my kitchen island or my computer table. When I unfold the drying rack for laundry it sits between Bedcouch and the TV, leaving no more space in the living "room" for things like exercise or people.

Living "Room"

Yesterday I read a horoscope that reminded me a lot of my Discardian lifestyle. Lately I've run out of things to toss. Already had a big purge of stuff over the summer. For the most part, my home is pretty neat except for the computer/work table, where the beads and junk mail live.

If I've run out of things to Discard, and my home is pretty consistently neat, why does it feel so cramped?

*Gasp* BEDCOUCH!!!

I chose Bedcouch this from the island of unused family furniture for my new apartment because:

1. It was my childhood bed (plus a newer mattress).
2. Offered crash/cuddle space for visitors.
3. Storage underneath.
4. Free!

Now we are reevaluating our relationship.

1. Childhood was not so much fun akshally. And a decade ago.
   
2. Not a lot of people come to visit me in Central Queens. Nobody comes to my house for cuddles.
3. Stored inside is extra bedding for Bedcouch, and a ton of photos that I could scan. The drawer closest to the wall is blocked by my end table.
4. It is taking up a lot of space that I pay to live in (mortgage, maintenance), and gets in the way of exercise and other fun stuff.
   

At first I was looking to replace it with a big puffy easy chair or recliner, but those are expensive. I am also pathologically afraid of getting bedbugs from new purchases of anything made of fabric. And stationary furniture may still get in the way of swordy fun time. But it is nice to have a seating area across from the TV, or diagonal from my computer screen, for the rare night I have off for watching DVDs. Usually all that sits on Bedcouch is laundry baskets & craft supplies.

Now I'm leaning towards an inflatable couch like this one. Comes with gadgets!! It can be folded up and put away when there are parties, swords*, or both. Or construction. Even better, I can take it to conventions and use it as a bed! No more having to fight for bed space at the con!

This weekend I'm planning to stay home and relax, a LOT. (Life = crazy, hence delays in blogness.) This will give me plenty of time to figure out the fate of Bedcouch. And all the extra pillows and bed linens that would go with it. Hail Discardia!



*The swords I practice with are not actually sharp, so not a threat to inflatable furniture.

Tomatoes!

Yay, gardening. My co-op finished renovating my balcony and gave it back to me in late May. I brought my pots back, there was much rejoicing.

This summer's new project was adopting two tomato plants, in addition to my herbs.


June!


July (plus basil)!


September!

Sadly, it's October and I've only had a couple tomatoes reach the edible stage. When they started flowering it was too hot, and when they set fruit it got too cold, and the post summer hot flash was so rainy they started to split. Argh! Next year I need to start them much earlier in the season and prune those extra branches.

Seven Weeks - End of Week Two

What I have learned thus far:

-I live almost entirely within my own head.

-Reprogramming your brain and being mindful of thoughts and actions is HARD and EXHAUSTING.

-Not whoring myself out to anyone who shows up to a given event saves a lot of energy.


All of last week I was exhausted. Although there were a lot of external circumstances that could have caused it as well, like my "moon time" and the NYC change of seasons making me sleepy. And the testing of fire alarms at work.

It was really nice to go straight home after work after spending my day as a library zombie, skip my usual weekly comedy shows, and not feel like I was missing an important opportunity to go out and meet people. I also saved my energy for an improv class show on Friday that I rocked out on.

Now I have more presence of mind to plan my weeks ahead of time, making space to rest for the plans and projects I really want to be awake for. Instead of chasing half-formed notions and daydreams at all hours of the night.

Back in my nicely decluttered home, I felt no loss at sitting back at my neat desk and watching Britcoms until I felt better, or just more ready for bed.

This weekend there was a lot of family problems that left me even more exhausted, so I have not been up for much blogging. Or anything, really. But once again being home to recuperate was not a big deal.

So far a life of celibacy means having less interest or desire in being out late with people. Or out at all. That means catching up on me time. And sleep, glorious sleep!

Spinster Has Run Out of Sassy

Maybe it is the summer doldrums (or the Summer Soul Flu), but I am exhausted. Thus, lack of blogging.


But it is Friday! Here, have some links. I've been trying to psych myself up to do some de-cluttering by looking at home improvement type blogs ;-)

Tiny-Ass Apartment. Like Apartment Therapy, only this blog is actually about APARTMENTS and not expensive houses with tons of space. Why do you do that, AT?

Lovely Undergrad. Like the aforementioned TAA, but with a college life spin. Adorbs!

Ikea Hacker. Almost handmade, always much fun.


Happy Weekend! Stay cool!

Life-Upgrade Update!

Last month's budget numbers were a little weird, due to my birthday celebrations and putting cash down on an improv class. But still hopeful.

My weekly discretionary budget is staring to work out, my habits need more tweeking than the budget itself does.

Cutting back on junk at the grocery store has significantly lowered my grocery bills. Fruit is a lot cheaper than cookies.

Pina Colada Sorbet was a wonderful idea for homemade. I don't feel the need to keep eating it until its gone like super rich homemade ice cream. Am trying to hack the recipe so I don't have to add any extra sugar.

I may try to kick my daily chocolate habit all together. I can't have just one piece, and too much makes me feel super yucky. This is freaking out my friends more than quitting alcohol *and* caffeinated drinks.

I GOT MY BALCONY BACK FROM THE RENO CREWS NOW I CAN PUT MY GARDEN TOGETHER AGAIN OMG YAY!

Still trying to figure out when I have time for making jewelry. That's super important, both for potential extra income and occupied alone-time.

Also trying to streamline my online presences to make it easier to promote all the weird stuff I do. May have to trade jewelry for another website, but this one will be super simple.

Allergy shots seem to be working *crosses fingers* along with all my new prescriptions.

After reading some of the blogs I posted about last week, am trying to talk to more new people. Not total strangers, but other people at the theaters I frequent whom I have not met yet. Seems good so far.

Figured out how to watermark/tag my improv show photos. I don't mind other people using them, but I like my credits.

Also figured out how to wire my Tumblr feed in advance to post improv photos. Back to obsessively photographing shows :-D

Space is Limited. Home is Infinite.

Yay, Apartment Therapy's Small Cool 2010 Contest is completed!

It's got lots of pretty home design pics, if that's what you're into. I am, and it went into crazy overdrive when I was home shopping in late 2008. Apartment Therapy is a good overall blog for that, although when I was reading it a year ago it was drifting from "apartment" to "general home things that don't fit in apartments." Maybe they're better now.

This contest was the awesome exception, a celebration of tiny spaces that people make livable and gorgeous.

My co-op apartment is less than 400 square feet, including the balcony and closets. Now that I'm settled in, maybe I will submit to this contest next year :-D Which gives me about 10 months to finish the kitchen reno (CRINGE), de-clutter, clean, and borrow a tripod to take some bitchin' photos.

So far, no matter how I angle the camera my home still looks way more cluttered than it is.

Lol, j/k ;-) This was moving week.

Internet Bounty

How To Clean Stuff dot Net. Thank goodness, because I am a spaz.


5 Minute Chocolate Cake. Baked in a coffee mug, in a microwave. This is a dangerous thing for me to find, so I'm sharing the peril.


Six Months of Rules. From "Premise," For the last six months of my twenties, I am going to follow "the Rules" of dating (or my best interpretation of them) and write about it.

Just reading the first few pages... Madam, you have way more patience for this than I would. Good luck with your project :-)


Are You Eating Yourself Into Debt? From Man Vs. Debt.

I definitely was.


Welcome to the Institute for Beyonce-related Cultural Studies. . . A despicable charade where so much is demanded of women, so much compliance and poking and prodding, so much effort to make ourselves beautiful and radiant and perfect, so much forcing of square pegs into round holes, just so we could meet it all, do it all, get close to the apex of perfection and still be worth nothing.

The Beyonce song reminds me of some back-foot humor. "How is a girl like you still single?" How are you dumb enough to ask me that question?

Don't Pity the Spinsters ;-)

My friend emailed me about this awesome article:
Don't Pity the Spinsters

Yay! It it so awesome to see women taking care of themselves, and their own. In a large swath of our society women are supposed to take care of themselves last. Supposedly a man is also supposed to take care of her, and children are supposed to be grateful and respectful, but when that fails the wife/mother has to pick up the slack anyway.

I agree with the author that if a person has found a partner that truly works and cares in equal amounts, awesome! Unfortunately, lots of people have a hard time distinguishing the differences between a partner and a parasite. Both men and women need to watch out for social/emotional/economic parasites. But when society still tells us we need to get hitched, this can get confusing and depressing.

I really like my life, I take care of myself :-). Well... I'm getting there. At least I have the time and space to listen to myself and fix my problems. It actually saves a lot of time and energy when you're not waiting for someone else to fix things for you.

Some people have not been supportive about this path I'm on. My friends and this author have similar stories. I still think that kind of nastiness stems from insecurity, that weird unhealthy need for people to tear others down. Especially when different choices lead to less miserable outcomes. Insecurity leads to the Romatrix, Neo.


While lurking, I found another article from Charleston that I liked:
A Home of One's Own

After my own real estate adventures, I'm still not quite ready to post advice on it. But I will someday. I totally know where this lady's been, although my situations and plans are a little different. Real estate makes ya crazy.


Now I'm leaving work to hang out with writers, bohemians, and crazy types ON A BOAT!

Want commitment? Get a mortgage...

Actually... never mind. Or just avoid BoA. They'll dun ya wrong...



How is a new home like a boyfriend? It eats up All. Your. Time.

I've been out of my normal social loops for weeks now, and spent more of ICON catching up with other NYC friends rather than attending panels. I'm still going to take it easy for April, activity wise, and slowly rebuild my nest while slowly reconnecting with my friends.

I was almost completely unpacked after the first weekend. I really steamed through those boxes. After waiting so long to relocate I had a lot of stress to work off. I have a few baskets full of clutter that I need to organize, store, and/or discard, but for the most part I'm done. Everything else on my to-do list is cosmetic.


The kitchen will have to wait a little while for renovations, because the co-op insists on charging me a $650 fee + $1500 deposit + engineering sketches for "structural" renovations.

"But... kitchen cabinets are cosmetic, not structural. Besides, I want to put up open shelves instead of cabinets."

"No, no there might be stuff UNDER the cabinets!! ZOMG!"

"So do you have an older engineer's sketch that shows whether or not there are wires or pipes right under the cabinets?"

"SHOW ME THE MONEY PUNY TENANT!"

Sigh. And the current cabinets are all moldy. Ick. I've lined them, but I know it's still there :-P


Otherwise, life is good again. Am settled in one place rather than slung between two, and have more time to relax. I'm also working on all the home projects I've had on hold for months. The new place gets direct sunlight, and last week I was able to watch a thunderstorm from my kitchen without fuss. Once it's warm enough, I can watch them from my balcony! Balcony garden? I CAN HAS! Now that my familiar books and possessions are out of their boxes, it's a lot more comfortable. And, um, a lot more cluttered. Photos are a great way of bringing that to attention. I'll work on it.

Patience is a virtue I lost at some point over the last few years, but lately I've worked hard to reclaim it. I'm being as patient as I can with myself in getting my home in order. Trying new things slowly to see what needs fixing. Not to mention re-balancing my finances. There were no breaks during the moving process, but my bank accounts got a little scuffed.

It *is* smaller than where I was renting, but it costs less and I use this space more effectively. But lets see how I feel about that once I start having parties again... Clown car time!!

<3 Sassy

Returned!

I'm back from NoLa, and back from ICON, and mostly settled into my new studio apartment.

Did not perform nearly as many seductions during those trips as I intended, but I was VERY tired from the stuff at home. I've made a good start on re-learning how to flirt, and I very much needed a vacation from everything.

And there are plenty of other pictures to look at while you're waiting for me to write something more coherent :-D

Palimpsest book launch in Brooklyn.

Palimpsest Chicago-New Orleans train trip.

My new home, aka The Chantry :-D

And if any of my fellow Palimpsest citizens want copies of these photos you have two options: a) Get a free Flickr account and download them. b) Email me and I'll send them to you.

This week's good/bad news:

Good news! I have a closing date for the co-op deal, next Thursday! *happydance* If everything works out, I can be moved into the new place by the end of the month.


Bad news! My lawyer called me back, asking if I was with HSBC or BoA. Because the bank lawyer mentioned HSBC, not BoA. In increasing order of possible bad: either the lawyer just flubbed and said the wrong bank by accident, or BoA sold my mortgage to HSBC (I think the deal would still go thru?), or the bank's lawyer has sent forms around for the wrong mortgage.

I know a bank can sell it's mortgages to other banks. I checked my documents before today, it says so, but also says whoever owns the mortgage can't make me pay it all at once or futz around with percents or payments.

But can a bank sell a mortgage when the property hasn't even been closed on? Without telling the purchaser?

Good thing I already have a lawyer.


BTW, Singles Awareness Week Blogathon! Next week! If you're coming to play, tell me so I can add you to our carnivale!

Gimme Shelter

I am currently in the midst of purchasing a co-op in Queens, NY. Is much more complicated than I was initially led to believe, but it's still moving forward. Will describe the process at length, later.

A few months ago, a friend asked for some advice on looking for a new rental apartment, and I sent her a long list of "Do's" and "Do Not's" which was ... comprehensive, but not very well organized. Am working on editing that so it makes more sense.


Overall, shelter is one of the necessities of human life, IMO. Far more than candle lit dinners, diamond engagement rings, and bouquets of flowers. There was a point in my life where I finally decided to work on what I had (an OK apartment) and not mull over what I did not (an s.o.).

Since that moment, I have become a frequent celebrator of DISCARDIA, started to read the blog Unclutterer on a daily basis, and borrowed several of my Mother's books on organization and decorating.

Now I'm working on purchasing a co-op that is smaller than my current apartment. After purging mountains of unused clothing, furniture, and junk from my house, and mulling over what necessities my current apartment lacks, I've come to terms with that. Bigger does not mean better, and this lesson is being hammered home to many Americans in many different ways this year.

I ran into an old friend a few weeks ago, and told her I was co-op hunting. "Oh really! With who?" she asked, innocently.

I was more amused than annoyed, but I'm pretty sure that's the default thought. Most people don't purchase a home by themselves, most don't even rent alone in NYC, which I've already done for 3.5 years. A few others suggested, helpfully, that I may not want to purchase a place until my life was settled with someone, because singleness can change at any moment. But in that case, so can relationship-ness.

Right now I'm in a rather stable place, as far as my job and finances are concerned (knock on wood) in this buyer's market, and there really isn't any beau on the horizon. Even if there was, I am slow to act and it would be quite a long time until the cohabitation stage. Most persons suggest that you should only plan to buy a home if you can imagine/plan on living there for 5 years minimum. I'm pretty sure that works for my sitch. And if something changes, I can sublet this apartment after two years.

Also, the place I'm looking at has concrete floors and ceilings, which means I can make a LOT more noise on the rare occasion that I bring a boy home with me. Yay! Right now my landlord lives directly above me in a rickety pre-war split house. I usually turn on the music really loud...


Have you ever bought a home on your own, or with someone that wasn't your lover/partner/ball-n-chain?